my advice vol. 3

Before I begin: two peeps say "FWIW" what does it mean?!?! You can let me know in the comments, or email me. But comments are better.

Q. Hot and Bothered Volunteer: I met a celebrity through my volunteer work, and we have flirted ever since we met. I'm young, unattached, and enjoy the occasional one night stand. This man has made it clear he wants to wine and dine me and then take me back to his place, and I'd take him up on the offer—I’m wildly attracted to his intensity and his passion for this cause—except for his tumultuous past. You can't believe everything you read, but he has a pretty dodgy reputation, and his outbursts have sent him to jail before. He has always been kind to me and the people around me, but it's also difficult to ignore how poorly he's treated women in the past. Would I be a bad person if I threw caution to the wind and had a brief fling with this person? I'm not interested in his money, his fame, or having a future with him.

A. GET ON IT.

Q. Annoying, Competitive Parents: My daughter does dance (cultural) and loves it. The problem is that the nature of the dance is so competitive that I find there is friction between me and other parents. My daughter is not the best dancer in the school, but loves to dance. However, the parents of some of the other children go to the competitions and act like their kid if winning the Super Bowl every time they get a medal. My daughter is starting to feel quite sad about not being in the group that always wins and I am not sure how to help her handle it. The parents are obnoxious with their competitive nature and need to win at any cost. One of them actually said rather loudly "go so and so, I hope you get a 1^st, 2^nd, or 3^rd." My daughter heard this and was upset that the parent didn't also encourage her. I encourage all the children, but find that some of the parents do not do so to my child. Any suggestions?

A. You should tell your cultural dance that some people are competitive douche bags and this is how life is. Then you should teach your kid how to dance better, because winning is the most important thing in life.

Q. Want Another Kid, but Maybe not the Marriage: My husband and I have been together for about 12 years, married for about 8, and have a wonderful 2 year old daughter. We are currently trying for baby No. 2 despite some on-going marital issues. These issues, which include my decreased attraction to him, having little in common, and me feeling basically unloved, are getting worse, not better, but I still plan to continue to try to conceive and here's why: He's a good father and if I'm going to have another child, I want it to be with him. Is this just completely wrong? I am still hopeful that we might be able to save our marriage, but even if I knew that that wasn't going to happen, I'd still go ahead and have another child with him. Am I being selfish? Short-sighted?

A. You left one out: delusional! This is crazy talk. You understand that in order to make this baby you need to have sex with this man, right? How/why would you do that in this situation? Not to, like judge, but you're weird.

Q. Dinner Parties, Recalled Food, Food Poisoning: I recently attended a dinner party at the house of two friends from college who are in a long-term relationship. Fondue was on the menu but the chocolate did not melt properly and the peanut butter never made it in. Later, though, I discovered that the peanut butter had been recalled because it was suspected of containing salmonella and was grateful that the recipe was unsuccessful. I informed the couple of this terrible news, but to my shock and surprise, they continue to eat this peanut butter, reasoning that if it was going to kill them, it would have done so already! Should I turn down my next invitation to dinner?

A. OMG YOU SHOULD GO GET YOUR STOMACH PUMPED! What if a tiny bit of peanut butter got in the fondue!?!?!? YOU MIGHT DIE!!!!!!!! Don't go to the next dinner party, or ANY dinner party, bitches tryin' to kill you.

Q. Former Secret Admirer: I developed my first real crush (the listen-to-sad-love-songs-at-night variety) when I was in middle school on an artsy and down-to-earth dreamboat a year ahead of me. Over the next couple years, I wrote him anonymous letters—maybe half a dozen total?—the content of which included "I like you"-language and were sort of chatty. Typical middle school note kind of stuff. I don't remember them being especially over-the-top romantic in any way. And, I actually mailed him these letters. (Quaint, huh?) As the years went by, we had mutual friends but my crush faded as others blossomed. I harbor no feelings now (20 years later)—but my question is, should I ever tell him it was me? Not in a dedicated email or anything but if I run into him one day? We're from a small town so it's not inconceivable I'll see him sometime when everyone is in the area at holiday time. Have any chatters ever been the recipient of this kind of thing? Are you dying to know or do you like the mystery? FWIW, I'm not dying to tell. Just wondering your thoughts.

A. My gut says tell him. First of all, would he even remember?! You won't know til you ask. Did he LOVE them? (See last answer.) OMG I'd be dying to know if I were him. I think it'd be the best, probably 100% awkward, but so the best. Then you'll get married! And have hate sex to make babies like the last LW! Oh, I love a good love story.